SAFETY PLAN

You are Fierce Beauty!
:: The language barrier, the distance from friends or family with whom to talk, the difficulties associated with seeking help, complex foreign legal system, where to find shelters and financial assistance, divorce and child custody issues put expatriate women in a very vulnerable position. ::








You are going to have to hide a bunch of things, in a variety of places, so that you have access to them when you have to leave for your safety, or when you have decided to leave for good.  Hide these important things everywhere, as a collective group in a series of small suitcases, or individually. 
  • The first rule of safety is to have someone in your life who is watching your back.  I recognize that this may be particularly difficult if you are living in an isolated area, are new to your location, or have been isolated by your partner/spouse.  Find someone!
  • Set-up a code word you can use with that person.  You might have to use it when your partner is near.  Make it simple and make it easy.
  • Make a list of safe people you can call.  Memorize their numbers as well as the numbers listed at the bottom of this post.
  • Buy a pay-as-you-go cell phone and extra minutes.  Place both in a zip lock baggie, and hide this - under a potted plant or in the home of one of your safe contacts.  If your partner has traditionally locked or barricades you in a room, hide the phone in that room.  CHARGE the extra phone periodically.
  • Practice.  Find the safest exits from your home.
  • During an argument, always attempt to position yourself near a room exit.  If you are not in a safe room, attempt to move the argument to an open area with more doors leading out.  Avoid the bathroom, kitchen, and garage.  These spaces have weapons.
  • Decide where you will go if you have to escape through a window.  Do this now, not when you are being threatened.
  • Allow the aggressor to win, this is what they want.  If your gut says that the situation is lethal, allow the aggressor to win as soon as possible.
NOW, LEAVE
  • Make copies of all your identification : drivers license, proof of automobile insurance, health insurance card, bank card, bank account records, and passport.  If these documents have been taken from you, attempt to get as many as you can by pointing out you would need them in the event you were ever stopped by the local police.   Make multiple copies, hiding them in various places.
  • Make copies of the keys to your home and car.  Not just one, but several.  Hide them in multiple places, and if possible, with your trusted friend.
  • Make a small bag of essentials - clothing, underwear, extra shoes.  In fact, make several.  Hide one in your car, at your friends' home, in the woods, in a park, under a boulder! 
RESOURCES
This first listing is for the agency I worked with in Austin, Texas.  The Safe Place site offers a bevy of resources for women and teens in violent relationships.  Review their Safety Plan section.  And Call Them, even if you don't live in Texas, or the United States.
http://www.safeplace.org/ 

This list of resources is from an article written by Susan Beverley, a writer and editor for Escape From America Magazine.  She also writes and maintains Expat Daily News – the expat news blog for EscapeArtist.com.  The resources were originally listed with the article Expat Women: Domestic Violence Abroad and have been reproduced with permission given to Susan Beverley.

Current as of 2/15/2012

IF YOU BELIEVE THAT YOUR COMPUTER ACTIVITIES ARE BEING MONITORED, CLEAR THE HISTORY or USE ANOTHER COMPUTER

The American Overseas Domestic Violence Crisis Center serves as a lifeline to Americans exposed to domestic violence anywhere in the world.  Their US hotline number (866) 879-6636 or (866-USWOMEN) is internationally toll free, so victims can contact the Crisis Line directly 24/7 from anywhere.  They also have live chat and an email address.

Information on domestic violence, with personal safety plans.

Lists help agencies for 191 countries.

Founded in 1995, the Healing Club is an online support community for domestic violence victims, survivors, and others who want to take part in the “healing” process or know someone who has been touched by domestic violence.  The Healing Club is about healing and rebuilding.

WAVE is a network of European women’s non-governmental organizations working in the field of combating violence against women and children.  They have contacts of over 4,000 women’s help organizations in the 47 countries of Europe, as well as information on research, international documents and the legal situation in each country.

A survivors’ handbook plus other useful information about domestic violence.

Be Safe
and remember, we love you.
The Broad

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