The Power of Words : Affirming Intention & Context : Part 2 of 3

::When you're drowning you don't think, I would be incredibly pleased if someone would notice I'm drowning and come and rescue me. You just scream.::
- John Lennon



A few years back, I had the pleasure of working with a team of counselors who went into middle and high schools to conduct groups with young women and men who either had been involved in a violent dating relationship or were at risk for being involved in this type of relationship.  Most outside agencies offering direct services to students have difficulty arranging space, coordinating time with students, and gaining the respect of teachers/administrators.  Having a contract with the school district means little outside of having permission to be on the campus.  To sidestep some of the issues associated with student attendance, one of our counselors had their attendees put the time for the next meeting into their cell phone calendars. I thought this was brilliant!  As our team had been looking at all the various ways our students used technology, with us of course attempting to figure out how we could tap into their teen brains, I realized that one of the more prevalent issues teens face, in fact, that we all face when we are in stressful situations, is a form of forgetfulness.  The knowledge that we have an arsenal of resiliency skills at our disposal seems to fly out the window.  

My experiment began with using the calendar in my own cell phone to send myself daily reminders of my own strengths.  Hopeful that this might aide my students and clients, as well as myself, I placed what I began to call, Secret Messages of Love™,  into that calendar.  The experiment was to last for one year.  My message was simply, "I trust myself."  I had the message timed to open at the beginning of my work day, but quickly realized I needed an earlier reminder.  To set my intention for how I would approach my life on those days, I had my Secret Messages of Love™ with my first cup of coffee.  Another thing I changed was the number of times I would receive the message throughout the week.  I moved from once a week to three times a week.  Over the course of a year, I found myself feeling pleasantly surprised each time my phone offered its' special ring for my Secret Messages of Love™ reminder, increasingly thinking of the deeper power behind the simplicity of  words, and knowing that after a year of washing my own brain in self-love,  this would be a powerful tool in the hands of my clients!

Inevitably, as I passed along this tool to my colleagues, there arose the concern of using this approach with clients that didn't have cell phones.  As many of my elementary students didn't have cell phones, I sent them home with a note to their parent, outlining the project.  If the note came back signed, giving the student permission to participate, the student went home with a Sharpie marker to use on a bathroom mirror or a window.  The next concern was how would a client come up with their Secret Messages of Love™.   Remember the Love Day : Write A Poem post?  That was one way to direct the process.  Yet, what I discovered, is that my clients knew what needed to be remembered.  A tiny level 5 tornado of love, a fiery first grader I worked with in an alternative elementary school, wrote, "I need my family to have money so we can always buy us some food!" on his bathroom mirror.  One group of middle school students, after having a discussion around the rate of suicide prompted by prolonged bullying, decided their Secret Messages of Love™ experiment would include "I will offer loving words to my friends."  My high school students, gathered for an all-school rally during Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month, sent out over 1,000  loving text messages to their friends.  The sound from all those cell phones going off at once was a thunder clap of BIG LOVE!  One of the most endearing messages came from a mother.  Just before going to bed, her message read, "I love MY SELF and MY CHILDREN.  ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!  

Sit back, close your eyes, and make your "I" statement.  Send it out to the Universe!  Put it in your cell phone!  Write it on your bathroom mirror!  And watch your world change!

Create the life you want!
The Broad
 

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